How To Become a Vampire
I was looking at some search stats and noticed that this question (how to become a vampire?) was more common than you might expect. Every day, nearly 100 people were looking for a way to join the ranks of the stylish undead. “An interesting topic for a little tutorial”, I thought. Hence this post.
It seems the jury’s still out on how, exactly, vampires are created. Some sources cite ancient beliefs (mostly useless superstition), some insist on the popular bitten-by-vampire myth, and some claim that you simply can’t “become” a vampire if you’ve been born human. Maybe there’s no single way. So, instead of focusing on any of the aforementioned approaches, I’ll describe three common vampiric features that you can attain without any supernatural help.
Hypnotism (AKA Mesmerism)
“True” vampires have it easy – some mind-control skills are supposedly included in the whole dark revenant package, along with good looks and sharp teeth. But don’t despair, … wait, no, despair is cool. Ahem. As I was saying, hypnosis and neuro-linguistic programming are well within the reach of mere mortals, so you are free to learn and use it – even if your heart is still beating. Head over to Google or Amazon.com
To get an (optimistic) idea of what you might achieve, take a look at Derren Brown. He’s done some very impressive things (videos).
Night Vision
Excellent low-light vision is something I’ve always wanted. You can improve your night vision by using a few tricks, and science might eventually figure something out.
The most promising idea I discovered is NightWalking. The website has a heavy slant towards philosophy/spirituality that reminds me vaguely of Carlos Castaneda, but it also contains a detailed guide on improving your peripheral vision. As you might already know, in a situation when there’s very little light, peripheral vision is much more effective than central vision. Better peripheral vision = better night vision, so this is definitely something worth trying.
Dark and Mysterious
The “dark” part won’t be a problem – just pick something from the wide range of goth stuff available. Maybe invest in coloured contact lenses and/or appropriate makeup.
As for being mysterious, well… * nods and smiles knowingly *
Ah, okay, I’ll be more verbose. There’s a bunch of lame tutorials about “how to be mysterious” on the web, but they’re generally a crazy mix of the somewhat useful and the completely ridiculous. In my opinion the coveted “aura of mysteriousness” is a pinch of secrecy + a certain form of inner confidence. And it’s not the kind of confidence that lets you approach strangers and sing on stage. I’m talking about the kind that frees you from seeking external validation of your thoughts, actions and existence. This is something that very few people have, but it can be learned. Think.
Miscellaneous Thoughts
I suspect most people in the “how to become a vampire” crowd are looking for a shortcut to becoming cool (is that a pun?). That is understandable. My main reservation about this is that it’s an unlikely shortcut — and that most wanna-be’s don’t really understand what they’re asking for when they say “I want to be a vampire!”.
Personally, I consider the concept of blood-craving bona-fide vampires unrealistic. I haven’t seen any reasonable biological explanations for it, and the idea that “it’s magic!” doesn’t do it for me on this overall low-magic planet. Psychic vampirism is a different thing entirely, but there’s generally nothing glamorous about being unable to sustain your existence without becoming a (possibly unknowing) parasite. Okay, parasitism might not be the only way, but I won’t discuss that here.
Hey, this is probably the weirdest post on this site (so far) 
@Kirsten -u p a vampire like me
@xXsilent_death_sonataXx – If you wanna become a vampire I can help you. There are ways, just most people are stupid to look toward the internet to find out how. You just gotta dig deeper. If you’re interested email me at hickmanc55@yahoo.com
HELLO CODY. MY NAME IS AKASHA WINTERS AND I REALLY NEED YOUR HELP. YOU SEE MY EX BOYFRIEND HATED THE FACT THAT IAM A VAMPIRE SO I HAD TO BREAK UP WITH HIM. COULD YOU GIVE ME ANY TYPE OF ADVICE THAT MIGHT HELP ME IN THE FUTURE?@Cody -
Is anyone willing to leading me some good advice?
there is little advise i can give but 4 what i know there are 2 things u can do. U can
either resist ur craving and try to hide the fact that u are a vamp or u can try to convert back to human which is really hard. i am neither vamp or human. i am a cross breed i am half vamp half human so in tech terms i am a dhampir. i have only some of a vampires affinities. i have excellent night vision and i have a craving 4 blood but i am not burned by sunlight.
IS IT EASY TO BECOME A DHAMPIR? WHAT WOULD I HAVE TO DO? IF ITS POSSIBLE COULD YOU HELP ME?
ok. heres the thing. im not sure if im a vampire or not. i dont have pale skin or any special talents(i dont think) but i have this insane thirst for blood. my teacher suggested iron deficiency(sp). and i already ruled out that possibility a long time ago. i mean im dependant apon blood for my nutrition. i can live without it but i crave it. and im rather sensative to the smell of blood. im just really bothered why i cant seem to find an answer to my odd behavior. and if vampire is a possibilty im really worried about the people around me. any help on the situation??? PLEASE!
I’m not sure how i became a dhampir but one day i woke up with an insane thirst and water wasn’t cutting it. so about a month ago i went to the doctors and they said that i was hypoglycemic. but later that day when cut my self i had an want 4 the blood hat was flowing out of my arm. and i feel fine after i drink some blood.
there are multiple ways to help stop cravings but most involve pain to u or another person.
1.u can cut ur self and drink ur blood
or
2.u can try to resist ur cravings and most likely fail and go on a blood rampage.
there is a possibility that u arn’t a vamp and u are a dhampir like me. there are a few dhampirs that i know of but we are spread out in the U.S. and i am the only one with a blood craving. and it is a pain in my @$$!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WELL……HERES THE THING I DO CRAVE BLOOD AND YES I DO DRINK MY OWN BLOOD. I PREFER GOING OUT AT NIGHT BUT HERES WHY I THINK THAT IAM A DHAMPIR……I CAN GO OUTSIDE AND NOT GET BURNED BY SUNLIGHT. MY VISION IS EXCELLENT AT NIGHT. SO I HONESTLY REALLY THINK IAM A DHAMPIR. ITS A GREAT FEELING.
kool now i know more of my kind. u can e-mail me at ishida_uruuyu@hotmail.com
DHAMPIR IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO KNOW MORE ABOUT ME. YOU CAN E-MAIL ME AT Gemini_doll_baby@yahoo.com.
none of u know anything about vampires. ur all humans who come up with fake crap.
WELL……SPEAKING BEHALF OF ALL OF THE VAMPIRES AND DHAMPIRS ON THIS SITE. WHO CARES. FIRST OF ALL DON’T YOU DARE COME IN HERE AND DIS ALL OF THE VAMPIRES AND DHAMPIRS IN HERE. I HAVE A QUESTION FOR YOU……WHY ARE U UP IN HERE DISRESPECTING WHAT WE ARE AND ALL OF ARE BELIEVES? ANOTHER THING YOU SAY THAT NONE OF US KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT VAMPIRES? WHY DON’T YOU JUST LEAVE IT ALONE, BEFORE WE GET YOU KURECHI!!!!!!
i would like to become a vampire
anyone wanna help me
i have been waiting a long time to beome one
please help
thank u
…idk how to be one but it comes as a curse if u wish to be in light and i am thankful i am only half vamp and half human.
it comes with birth and blood given by another. nothing on the internet is safe anymore. nothing is real. go to tampa, florida, and ask anyone on the street for Darkness Rising. the only gang that knows ANYTHING about vampires, Dhampirs, and any other thing. there is your destiny. find us, and we will reward you. we are wating.
Yeahh, I dont like notbeing able to o out in the sunlight all the time, but it does have its ups && downss.
@Dark – ARE YOU ACTUALY PART OF THE GANG?
LOL I’M GOING TO GET A CROSS SO MANY VAMPIRES WANNABE HERE! I WILL REMAIN A HUMAN.
You people honestly make me want to kill myself.
” i ish da mean blud drinking vampiire who can nt spel”
How old are you? Five? Jeeze, Mari, and Joe. Honestly.
Vampirism is an ancient belief that many have sought after. Its certianally not going to be rewarded to some bafoon who types like a gorilla…
No, I’m not saying that all Vampyres have proper grammer or that they speak good English. What I am saying is that usually those who go around brodcasting the the world that they are a Vampyre or Dampyre fall a little short.
Self-feeding, by the way, is excruciatingly painful, and rarely actually covers any cravings you might be experiancing, as well as making yourself dreadfully sick.
Please, don’t mock a beautiful legend with your stupidity. Its not fair to those of us who actually think.
people plz help, i want to become a dhampir so bad i get a thurst for blood a strong urge for humans. i have a girl friend and when we kiss i get a urg of blood of her human smell. how can i get the vampire atributes. plz help. u can text me at 812-202-2553 or email me at paintball_king92@hotmail.com plz hurry.
@Schuyler Lodemai –
stop reading twilight
Hi guys,
I just found this new feature that allows users to upload their photo and to check if they’re a vampire or not
http://www.pollsb.com/create/are_you_a_vampire
check it out, it’s pretty cool
enjoy
Hello. I’m Kaylee. I’m 12 years old. My mother was a Vampire and my father is a Human. My mother died because she didn’t drink any blood because she didn’t want to hurt anyone. But,before she died she wanted to know what my blood tasted like so she bit me.
Now, there are 2 scars on my neck and my eyes turn red. Is that normal? And I offen have a hunger for blood. I almost drank my little sisters blood once when she was 7. She said that I had fangs and my eyes started to glow red again. I have no clue if that’s true but I couldnt controll myself untill my dad walked in the room. I need your help. I’m very terrified at what I’ve become. Please reply at my e-mail: kayleeseno@yahoo.com
Like idk if i am or not but i think there cool, but my mother tells me its not real and i should get those thoughts out of my head. When i see blood in movies i makes me wanna try it and when i get cuts i always lick the blood and my older brother yells at me telling me thats yucky. and like I’m in the line where im confused and don’t know or how to. i wouldn’t mind being a vampire, but drinking 4 qints of blood is kinda silly. =l someone help. myspace.com/kairi23 or email me at kotacub@yahoo.com
HEY EVERYBODY! I REALLY NEED SOMEONE’S HELP, THERE IS THIS GUY WHO IAM REALLY GOOD FRIENDS WITH AND EVERYTIME I SEE HIM I JUST WANT TO POUNCE ON HIM AND BITE HIS NECK AND DRINK HIS BLOOD. ANYTHIME THAT HE IS NEAR ME I JUST WANT TO DRINK HIS BLOOD. I CRAVE HIM SO MUCH.I DON’T WANT TO HURT HIM BECAUSE HE IS A REALLY GOOD FRIEND TO ME BUT AT THE SAME TIME I JUST FEEL LIKE HE’S TEASING ME WITH THE WAY HE LOOKS AT ME. IAM IN NEED OF HELP VERY BADLY. WHAT SHOULD I DO? PLEASE HURRY BEFORE IT’S TO LATE. U CAN TEXT ME AT 443-669-4389 OR EMAIL ME AT: Gemini_doll_baby@yahoo.com. please help.
Napkin is a vampire it suck ladies blood.
Dear Kaylee,If you really are a vampire.You are lucky I found you.I am also a vampire and here is my story.I can help.I am unfortunately stuck at 10.It was 1901 when I was out for a short walk home from my friends.I got sidetracked and turned a wrong way.I think I had been walking for about an hour when I noticed I was going the wrong way.I wandered into the forest and I was in the middle of a hunt for some vampires.That’s how I am stuck.Before I was a vampire I had brown eyes,brown hair,and was a little weak.Now I have dark brown hair,gold eyes and I have 100% more power then any human.Here is what you need to do if you’re alone.Join the nearest coven.Depending on where you live you can join the nearest coven or move somewhere.Join the Speedest coven whick is in Europe,the Paresa coven which is in Mexico,the Strines coven which is in Antartica,the Hailus coven which is in South America,the Reneem coven which is in Africa,the Chestardo coven which is in Australia,Babeus coven which is in Asia,the Ayus coven which is in Canada,and finally,the Finusleadus coven which is in North America.I admit human blood is tasty.But always hunt animals.If you’re hunting stop by my coven and we can go hunting togather.Respond if you have anything to say.To Kaylee age 12.From Jake age 10.
Dear Dria,8/10 vampires have talents.Try everything you can.I have a talent to control love.It isn’t that bad.Except the fact I’m a boy.If you are a vampire go hunt some animals and fill up a bunch of cups with it’s blood.Drink it until you have absolutely had enough.Then, hang around your friends.If you’re full of blood it dosn’t bother you as much.Keep trying to find your talent.Remember to try absolutely everything.To Dria,From Jake.