How To Become a Vampire
I was looking at some search stats and noticed that this question (how to become a vampire?) was more common than you might expect. Every day, nearly 100 people were looking for a way to join the ranks of the stylish undead. “An interesting topic for a little tutorial”, I thought. Hence this post.
It seems the jury’s still out on how, exactly, vampires are created. Some sources cite ancient beliefs (mostly useless superstition), some insist on the popular bitten-by-vampire myth, and some claim that you simply can’t “become” a vampire if you’ve been born human. Maybe there’s no single way. So, instead of focusing on any of the aforementioned approaches, I’ll describe three common vampiric features that you can attain without any supernatural help.
Hypnotism (AKA Mesmerism)
“True” vampires have it easy – some mind-control skills are supposedly included in the whole dark revenant package, along with good looks and sharp teeth. But don’t despair, … wait, no, despair is cool. Ahem. As I was saying, hypnosis and neuro-linguistic programming are well within the reach of mere mortals, so you are free to learn and use it – even if your heart is still beating. Head over to Google or Amazon.com
To get an (optimistic) idea of what you might achieve, take a look at Derren Brown. He’s done some very impressive things (videos).
Night Vision
Excellent low-light vision is something I’ve always wanted. You can improve your night vision by using a few tricks, and science might eventually figure something out.
The most promising idea I discovered is NightWalking. The website has a heavy slant towards philosophy/spirituality that reminds me vaguely of Carlos Castaneda, but it also contains a detailed guide on improving your peripheral vision. As you might already know, in a situation when there’s very little light, peripheral vision is much more effective than central vision. Better peripheral vision = better night vision, so this is definitely something worth trying.
Dark and Mysterious
The “dark” part won’t be a problem – just pick something from the wide range of goth stuff available. Maybe invest in coloured contact lenses and/or appropriate makeup.
As for being mysterious, well… * nods and smiles knowingly *
Ah, okay, I’ll be more verbose. There’s a bunch of lame tutorials about “how to be mysterious” on the web, but they’re generally a crazy mix of the somewhat useful and the completely ridiculous. In my opinion the coveted “aura of mysteriousness” is a pinch of secrecy + a certain form of inner confidence. And it’s not the kind of confidence that lets you approach strangers and sing on stage. I’m talking about the kind that frees you from seeking external validation of your thoughts, actions and existence. This is something that very few people have, but it can be learned. Think.
Miscellaneous Thoughts
I suspect most people in the “how to become a vampire” crowd are looking for a shortcut to becoming cool (is that a pun?). That is understandable. My main reservation about this is that it’s an unlikely shortcut — and that most wanna-be’s don’t really understand what they’re asking for when they say “I want to be a vampire!”.
Personally, I consider the concept of blood-craving bona-fide vampires unrealistic. I haven’t seen any reasonable biological explanations for it, and the idea that “it’s magic!” doesn’t do it for me on this overall low-magic planet. Psychic vampirism is a different thing entirely, but there’s generally nothing glamorous about being unable to sustain your existence without becoming a (possibly unknowing) parasite. Okay, parasitism might not be the only way, but I won’t discuss that here.
Hey, this is probably the weirdest post on this site (so far) 😉
Related posts :
Subscribe via RSS
Get Updates by Email
destiny, if you dont beleave in vampires then why are you here…that makes no scence.
shelby
I want to be a vampire Idc if it hurts to become one
or anything I wanna be one
What are the symptoms for becoming a Vampire, like how do you know??
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’m soooo sorry about that!! Its just that today is the 27 (i think) but some entries were entered on the 28!! Thats tomorrow!!! Some one plez tell me I’m not going insane!! stuff like this has been happening to me all day!
Like some one got on my buss but she really didnt!!
first of all, if you can see well in the dark, that could be a symptom.(or u eat too many carrots), if u crave blood, or if you can barely see in the light. u might not have all of these if u are a damphire. I only see in the dark and barely see in light. But then again, sometimes my eyes are light grey so that might have something to do with it.
Hmmmmmm… Well I can see well in the dark, but in the light as well. I glow in the dark because I’m so pale, that the moon bounces off my skin. I LOVE carrots,but do not eat to many. I do crave blood, but I thought that was just my amaganation.
i can see in the dark…the light hurts my eyes but thats because i have an astigmatizm…my eyes are lighter in the dark…i prefer human food…the smell of blood is enough to make me sick… ‘m always hotter then everybody…i cant run fevers(or atleast never have)
my lovely boy friend drinks his blood(he did it in front of me(i didn’t want to hurt his feelings and tell him it was making me sick so i just kinda looked away)) i don’t know about the see in the dark thing..i’ve never asked…he isn’t fond of the sun and i think he said it hurts his eyes a bit. he is paler then me and he lives in the sunnest place i know…i think he said he’s a smig colder then every body.
i dont know what this means for me nor do i care….my darling boyfriend on the other hand i know what he is and surprisingly it doesn’t scare me.
shelby
Yes I am a Dhampir but I am not a hunter. I am young(very young) so that may be the cause of it. That I don’t know. Today in class my friend got a small cut that was bleeding a little and that alone almost sent me into a frenzy! Even my classmates must question my behavior. I need advice!! I may not be a full vampire and I may be only a Dhampir but if someone at my school knew… I don’t know what I would do!!! Please give me advice…
Also if I see blood I go coockoo which is bad, because most of my friends bleed like crazy!! I am cooler than everyone, but so is my mom, so i guess i get it from her…
And I dont seem to get hurt as often.
Can anybody be my donor? I live in sydney, australia! PLEASE! I NEED A HUMAN DONOR!
Love, if you needed one…why didn’t you ask me…i dont want you to hurt any body…please just don’t harm any body…but no matter what i love you forever…
Umm… I most likely shouldn’t interfear like this, but i cant let it go..
Tellmesomething, if u need one so badly I think the best person to go with would be shelby. She’s understanding and it might work out better.
Shelby, (I’m not trying to be mean to anyone), U live far away from him and he just might not want u mixed up in all of it….
Tellmesomething, I think u should go with Shelby’s offer… But what do I kow, I’m just lending an opinin.
thank you maddie, i love the way you think…love, you dont have to.i know i love far away but i would rather it be me than an inocent person…i know it will be hard to get to me but you can drink till your saticfide…please love…do this for me…
i love you forever
and thank you again maddie.
well i think i’m a half vampire and i just relized…my eyes change colors when i’m angery ot in the dark…i have geat eye sight in the dark…the sun hurts my eyes…but i was told that was because of an astigmatizm…if i get hurt it heels fast…i have in very sharp teeth…my bottom K9 point tward my top…but the sight of blood makes me sick…but the tast is nothing…i need help
thanks
hey its me from up there^^^^^…..i have one more thing quite like shelby i have hot fire skin and have never ran a fever…..does anybody know what the h*** i am
please help me
hey me again, if any of the vampires live in jacksonvill florida or close, then please email me at camo.baybay@gmail.com
help_me What we are is called Dhampirs. Most don’t have that insane of a thirst for blood and don’t have super sharp teeth like i don’t but some do. My eyes are changeable and sometimes I contemplate cutting myself to get blood. My teeth aren’t that sharp. I have acute see, smell, and hearing. But I do have a ability. I can astral travel sort of really. When I dream it’s like I’m in another world not dreming. Oh and I can feel pain in my dreams too. E-mail me at bmckinnon81@yahoo.com
Shelby y ask him for u to be his donor if ur his girlfriend?
be cause i dont want him alover some other person…haha…no its because i’ve had a deam that drank a guy with cancer’s blood and he got super sick and i had to go and be with him as he gavve me the last kiss he died and i cant let that happen…i would still much rather it be me because i know i’m not sick…
well i found out what i am thank god…I’m a dhampir…the vampire blood skiped two generations…it waas passed down from the womans side but it was started by a man…thats how its sposed to happen…this explanes alot…now i require guidens and knowlage…maybe if a full vampire wants to help…i already have a half but she’s just about as clules as i am…so may be charles you can help…
thanks