How To Become a Vampire
I was looking at some search stats and noticed that this question (how to become a vampire?) was more common than you might expect. Every day, nearly 100 people were looking for a way to join the ranks of the stylish undead. “An interesting topic for a little tutorial”, I thought. Hence this post.
It seems the jury’s still out on how, exactly, vampires are created. Some sources cite ancient beliefs (mostly useless superstition), some insist on the popular bitten-by-vampire myth, and some claim that you simply can’t “become” a vampire if you’ve been born human. Maybe there’s no single way. So, instead of focusing on any of the aforementioned approaches, I’ll describe three common vampiric features that you can attain without any supernatural help.
Hypnotism (AKA Mesmerism)
“True” vampires have it easy – some mind-control skills are supposedly included in the whole dark revenant package, along with good looks and sharp teeth. But don’t despair, … wait, no, despair is cool. Ahem. As I was saying, hypnosis and neuro-linguistic programming are well within the reach of mere mortals, so you are free to learn and use it – even if your heart is still beating. Head over to Google or Amazon.com
To get an (optimistic) idea of what you might achieve, take a look at Derren Brown. He’s done some very impressive things (videos).
Night Vision
Excellent low-light vision is something I’ve always wanted. You can improve your night vision by using a few tricks, and science might eventually figure something out.
The most promising idea I discovered is NightWalking. The website has a heavy slant towards philosophy/spirituality that reminds me vaguely of Carlos Castaneda, but it also contains a detailed guide on improving your peripheral vision. As you might already know, in a situation when there’s very little light, peripheral vision is much more effective than central vision. Better peripheral vision = better night vision, so this is definitely something worth trying.
Dark and Mysterious
The “dark” part won’t be a problem – just pick something from the wide range of goth stuff available. Maybe invest in coloured contact lenses and/or appropriate makeup.
As for being mysterious, well… * nods and smiles knowingly *
Ah, okay, I’ll be more verbose. There’s a bunch of lame tutorials about “how to be mysterious” on the web, but they’re generally a crazy mix of the somewhat useful and the completely ridiculous. In my opinion the coveted “aura of mysteriousness” is a pinch of secrecy + a certain form of inner confidence. And it’s not the kind of confidence that lets you approach strangers and sing on stage. I’m talking about the kind that frees you from seeking external validation of your thoughts, actions and existence. This is something that very few people have, but it can be learned. Think.
Miscellaneous Thoughts
I suspect most people in the “how to become a vampire” crowd are looking for a shortcut to becoming cool (is that a pun?). That is understandable. My main reservation about this is that it’s an unlikely shortcut — and that most wanna-be’s don’t really understand what they’re asking for when they say “I want to be a vampire!”.
Personally, I consider the concept of blood-craving bona-fide vampires unrealistic. I haven’t seen any reasonable biological explanations for it, and the idea that “it’s magic!” doesn’t do it for me on this overall low-magic planet. Psychic vampirism is a different thing entirely, but there’s generally nothing glamorous about being unable to sustain your existence without becoming a (possibly unknowing) parasite. Okay, parasitism might not be the only way, but I won’t discuss that here.
Hey, this is probably the weirdest post on this site (so far) 😉
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Hello everyone. My name is Jayne, im 12 years old, and i know im not human. I have changed alot recently. My eyes have started to change colour, and my naturally light brown hair has turned into a dark brown!
I keep on hearing things in my head. If i cocentrate, i can hear talking, and then someone near me will say what i heard!
Its really freaking me out. My sence of smell has gotten stronger, if someone starts to bleed, i can smell it from a fair distance away. I can see better in the dark too!
SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME WHAT IS GOING ON!
gah i made a spelling mistake.
concentrate. not cocentrate.
I agree with middie. EMO ALERT if your so sure they don’t exist then don’t wast your time on a vampire site or do you just enjoy fighting and look for internet fights because you no that no one at your home will tolerate it and that you cant win if it is face to face just a little heds up not every one on the internet is gullible and stupid. and your not the only one who has seen hard times (not that I know if you have had hard times)
I apologize for the rant but people like that really make me mad!
right on Kess!! U tell ’em!!
Sorry… that might have been a bit mean….
Jayne, welcome to the site^^ hope u enjoy it as much as I have!!
OK one of ya HAS to like twilight! So go to pikabi.webs.com
Hi everybody. How are you.
Oh and by the way. . . Come on Charles you are better then that and also. . . i am Shelby’s boyrfirend/partner and she isn’t going on anytime soon. Oh and brittany… You are going through a phase-_- None of us can levitate things or have super powers, so… No offence intended but your mind is going koo koo. You might be a supernatural but i don’t think your a vampire. Anyone that would like to talk to me my email is cripleader@hotmail.com and… Maddie. . . Thanks for caring.
Hey tellmesomething i’ve been noticing Shelby hasn’t been on yahoo messenger lately so what’s up! I need to talk to her! As her FRIEND i deserve to know!
Hey EMO ALERT It’s a good way to get blood if you DON’T want to be a monster, so DON’T KNOCK IT TILL’ YOU TRY IT!
I presume things arnt going well with you all.
1.) i know a huntiff of full moons deruct our abilitys to think and can sometimes change the way we act.. of which i understand that some people presume there vampires!
Some people i know have thought to have ability’s which enable them to seringe things in the wierdest shape and form!
I’ve seen this happen and i shall be there to see it happen again.
Tellmesomething, no prob^^ I like helping people (even though thats not really what I did on this site.) Umm but I do have a question for u… What do u mean by caring?? In my head i do care, but i just gave my opinion. But thanx for thinking that^^
Sorry if that sounded mean…
And I am soo glad to hear that Shelby is ok^^
Oh^^ I have got something I want to tell everyone!! This isnt really important but I wan to tell u^^
I can see ghosts!! It sucks, ‘cuse they watch me while I sleep!! And 1 folowed me from baby sitting! and now he lives in my home…
Where I live and lot of Indians got killed, so I can get very busy… And no it is NOT fun.
Guys. (half and maddie) Add me so we don’t have to chat through a website. It saves time.
Madison I think I have done something terrible oh and tellmesomething you better believe that she cares she is about the most caring friend you could get ^^ sorry that may have been a bit harsh ^^
Madison I give up so I might as well help you explain that the one that lives in her bedroom is a girl with a young child.^^
what is it?
Oh…That their ghosts that live in my bedroom… I think..
Tellmesomething I think thats a great idea^^
Kess… ur rambaling….
Use the dark sign…. riddle this ghost away to peace!
There are symbles all over the internet…… all u need to do is sit in a romm wid four soul carryiers and prayer to the sudden god… i can give you thee following words to use via the table structure…
Remember to use a vivid wax candle…. hung up in the middle of the table… and draw a circle around everyone showing they shall not enter…!
Umm, I dont understand u (I dont usaly get stuff unless its really simplifyed.)
And the ghosts in my bedroom, r nice…. They just creep me out, because they stare at me while I sleep..
Tellmesomething, I dont what u mean by ‘add me’, can I get ur email instead. U dont have to give it to me.
Seek my advise……
They stare at you, deduct research at them…. when they come out at night and when they go at night.
If you get enough equivalent data you’ll be able to stop the deductile!
Thanks^^ Umm they wont talk to me.. if thats what u meant..