How To Become a Vampire
I was looking at some search stats and noticed that this question (how to become a vampire?) was more common than you might expect. Every day, nearly 100 people were looking for a way to join the ranks of the stylish undead. “An interesting topic for a little tutorial”, I thought. Hence this post.
It seems the jury’s still out on how, exactly, vampires are created. Some sources cite ancient beliefs (mostly useless superstition), some insist on the popular bitten-by-vampire myth, and some claim that you simply can’t “become” a vampire if you’ve been born human. Maybe there’s no single way. So, instead of focusing on any of the aforementioned approaches, I’ll describe three common vampiric features that you can attain without any supernatural help.
Hypnotism (AKA Mesmerism)
“True” vampires have it easy – some mind-control skills are supposedly included in the whole dark revenant package, along with good looks and sharp teeth. But don’t despair, … wait, no, despair is cool. Ahem. As I was saying, hypnosis and neuro-linguistic programming are well within the reach of mere mortals, so you are free to learn and use it – even if your heart is still beating. Head over to Google or Amazon.com and check out the numerous sites and books available. Just don’t fall for the “forbidden secrets revealed!!” shtick and you should be fine.
To get an (optimistic) idea of what you might achieve, take a look at Derren Brown. He’s done some very impressive things (videos).
Night Vision
Excellent low-light vision is something I’ve always wanted. You can improve your night vision by using a few tricks, and science might eventually figure something out.
The most promising idea I discovered is NightWalking. The website has a heavy slant towards philosophy/spirituality that reminds me vaguely of Carlos Castaneda, but it also contains a detailed guide on improving your peripheral vision. As you might already know, in a situation when there’s very little light, peripheral vision is much more effective than central vision. Better peripheral vision = better night vision, so this is definitely something worth trying.
Dark and Mysterious
The “dark” part won’t be a problem – just pick something from the wide range of goth stuff available. Maybe invest in coloured contact lenses and/or appropriate makeup.
As for being mysterious, well… * nods and smiles knowingly *
Ah, okay, I’ll be more verbose. There’s a bunch of lame tutorials about “how to be mysterious” on the web, but they’re generally a crazy mix of the somewhat useful and the completely ridiculous. In my opinion the coveted “aura of mysteriousness” is a pinch of secrecy + a certain form of inner confidence. And it’s not the kind of confidence that lets you approach strangers and sing on stage. I’m talking about the kind that frees you from seeking external validation of your thoughts, actions and existence. This is something that very few people have, but it can be learned. Think.
Miscellaneous Thoughts
I suspect most people in the “how to become a vampire” crowd are looking for a shortcut to becoming cool (is that a pun?). That is understandable. My main reservation about this is that it’s an unlikely shortcut — and that most wanna-be’s don’t really understand what they’re asking for when they say “I want to be a vampire!”.
Personally, I consider the concept of blood-craving bona-fide vampires unrealistic. I haven’t seen any reasonable biological explanations for it, and the idea that “it’s magic!” doesn’t do it for me on this overall low-magic planet. Psychic vampirism is a different thing entirely, but there’s generally nothing glamorous about being unable to sustain your existence without becoming a (possibly unknowing) parasite. Okay, parasitism might not be the only way, but I won’t discuss that here.
Hey, this is probably the weirdest post on this site (so far) 😉
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Look I’m a bitch so what, but don’t call me a bitch! And why would you? Because you couldn’t get married to a vampire? Sorry-but hey hes dead so chill the fuck out! goodbye Jayne Is Gay!
Sorry Jayne Is Gay i accidentally thought you were talking to me. I’m sorry. I’ve been uh in a weird mood. I think I had too much of my blood this morning. HA! Oh and vampire dude please respond.
Hay vamire dud i belive that u r a real vamire and if u r plzzzz change me u probably get this all the time but if u do i will do anything to repay u and u dont have to change me if u dont want to but i would be very thankful thx
i am serious serious about becoming one.. please.. can anyone answer my previous question and reply to meee? =x any vampires living on the equator?o_O
Mindy Delmorsal What did u want from me?
Lets go.You want me to change you well where do u live?
I hate to say it, but many people are quite wrong on how vampires are created. “Being bitten” isn’t even close to the exchange between a fully fledged vampire and it’s fledgling. Most vampires now-a-days are created from true vampires who were BORN vampires. They weren’t changed. Today’s group of young ones are quite ignorant as well. However, I must say, the information you’ve taken the time to look over and post is most impressive. Please, do continue to post info on the research you find. It’s quite intriguing.
If you’ve got any questions, email me
MorganSin_Littelle@hotmail.com
Hello Vampire Dude. I wanted you to change me, my friend. I would be ever so grateful if you did. I live in Tennessee. I rather would like to tell you more specifically where i live, but I’m a very causious person I suppose. I mostly want this so I protect the ones I love, but also I want to follow in my husbands life. I just recently found out he could be alive.-sigh-
Hello everyone. I think that you should all stop begging to be turned. Its not exactly a very pleasant lifestyle. You have to feed off innocent humans or animals, which dont satisfy me. I tend to feed once every 2 days. I try to feed on humans who dont have any close relatives. It is hardest when they look in to your eyes and say, stop, please. xo-jayne-ox@hotmail.com
I don’t know what to say to any of this. I can’t protect the ones I love and one of them dosen’t want me to be a vampire. I’ve wanted to be this a long time…but I feel so stupid. I don’t know If you will kill me or change me Vampiredude. You may call me Vincilia. I don’t know if you are who you say you are. Why expose yourself on the Enternet? Do you work for anyone? Who are you? I’m not normally this nosey-but it’s hard to not be. Do you understand my hesitation? I don’t know but reply soon.
Most expose themselves on the internet as they feel it is a safe way to expose who they really are. If you told any one something as special as being a vampire you would turn into a lab rat and be put on show purely for the amusement of others. ^^ xo-jayne-ox@hotmail.com
VINCILIA:Well my name is luke I am who I say I am.I only go on here for entertainment and to help people understand what it is like being a vampire.I don’t work for anyone.
jayne i added you on msn please accept i believe u are a vampire and id like to learn more about your life
so when are you gna change me????
Luke; I believe your words to be true. My ex- has been changed, but he has been forbidden to change me. I don’t know if I want this, because I wish not to hurt anyone. I don’t care that much anymore, but he is afraid I will die. You would’nt kill me would you? I still crave to be a vampire. Something so desirable, a beautiful creature of the night. I don’t know. They say the pain is unbearable. To be honest I’ve been through so much pain that maybe it won’t effect me as much. I am different from most people. I see pain in everything, but I know I do it to myself.-sigh-
Jayne. I believe that you are a vampire and i am going to ask you to change me. I have been looking for a real vampire for a very long time. Please dont let me down.
I wouldn’t kill you and It’s really hard to be a vampire,the thurst is unbearable.It’s is alot of pain for me to change you and it is very hard for me to just bite but I know i have the restraint to just bite.I swear I wouldn’t kill you but I will only change you if you desire to be bitten and changed.So it’s up to you
VampireDude: I am a vampire too and I am trying not to kill anyone, Last Thursay at approximatley 3 a.m. I coulnt take the thurst any longer and I killed a truck driver, I only wanted a sip of his blood but I couldnt take it, it had been so long since I had the blood. I just need to talk to someone that is going through the same thing that I am going through.
Decimo I know exactly what you are talking about the thurst is to hard to handle at times and it seems like you can control it. but If you keep it off your mind by subsituting it with sports or something.
VampireDude: I have tried. I was turned over 26 years ago and it is the biggest mistake of my life
To all of you people wanting to be turned: Please dont go down that path. being a vampire is the worst thing I have ever done, I sometime think about all of the innocent humans I have killed and how horrible the guilt is. All vampires ever do is want, and some, kill. And thats not what you would ever want. I have to live for a very long time being something I dont want to be for a couple months.