How To Become a Vampire
I was looking at some search stats and noticed that this question (how to become a vampire?) was more common than you might expect. Every day, nearly 100 people were looking for a way to join the ranks of the stylish undead. “An interesting topic for a little tutorial”, I thought. Hence this post.
It seems the jury’s still out on how, exactly, vampires are created. Some sources cite ancient beliefs (mostly useless superstition), some insist on the popular bitten-by-vampire myth, and some claim that you simply can’t “become” a vampire if you’ve been born human. Maybe there’s no single way. So, instead of focusing on any of the aforementioned approaches, I’ll describe three common vampiric features that you can attain without any supernatural help.
Hypnotism (AKA Mesmerism)
“True” vampires have it easy – some mind-control skills are supposedly included in the whole dark revenant package, along with good looks and sharp teeth. But don’t despair, … wait, no, despair is cool. Ahem. As I was saying, hypnosis and neuro-linguistic programming are well within the reach of mere mortals, so you are free to learn and use it – even if your heart is still beating. Head over to Google or Amazon.com
To get an (optimistic) idea of what you might achieve, take a look at Derren Brown. He’s done some very impressive things (videos).
Night Vision
Excellent low-light vision is something I’ve always wanted. You can improve your night vision by using a few tricks, and science might eventually figure something out.
The most promising idea I discovered is NightWalking. The website has a heavy slant towards philosophy/spirituality that reminds me vaguely of Carlos Castaneda, but it also contains a detailed guide on improving your peripheral vision. As you might already know, in a situation when there’s very little light, peripheral vision is much more effective than central vision. Better peripheral vision = better night vision, so this is definitely something worth trying.
Dark and Mysterious
The “dark” part won’t be a problem – just pick something from the wide range of goth stuff available. Maybe invest in coloured contact lenses and/or appropriate makeup.
As for being mysterious, well… * nods and smiles knowingly *
Ah, okay, I’ll be more verbose. There’s a bunch of lame tutorials about “how to be mysterious” on the web, but they’re generally a crazy mix of the somewhat useful and the completely ridiculous. In my opinion the coveted “aura of mysteriousness” is a pinch of secrecy + a certain form of inner confidence. And it’s not the kind of confidence that lets you approach strangers and sing on stage. I’m talking about the kind that frees you from seeking external validation of your thoughts, actions and existence. This is something that very few people have, but it can be learned. Think.
Miscellaneous Thoughts
I suspect most people in the “how to become a vampire” crowd are looking for a shortcut to becoming cool (is that a pun?). That is understandable. My main reservation about this is that it’s an unlikely shortcut — and that most wanna-be’s don’t really understand what they’re asking for when they say “I want to be a vampire!”.
Personally, I consider the concept of blood-craving bona-fide vampires unrealistic. I haven’t seen any reasonable biological explanations for it, and the idea that “it’s magic!” doesn’t do it for me on this overall low-magic planet. Psychic vampirism is a different thing entirely, but there’s generally nothing glamorous about being unable to sustain your existence without becoming a (possibly unknowing) parasite. Okay, parasitism might not be the only way, but I won’t discuss that here.
Hey, this is probably the weirdest post on this site (so far) 😉
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so looking over these posts, im just curious…
why do most of the vampyres (or people who claim to be vampyres) do not want to turn anyone else into one (besides the fact that there are some possible liars)? is it like what FreakyRJ said, and that vampyres feel guilt? i would be interested to hear what everyone has to say!
Now u Maddie re confusing me too… I said I’m sorry because I didn’t mean to be sarcastic. But if u were a vampire would u go to the morge and drink blood from dead people?
For those of us who are of vampyre kin, at least in my circumstance, I don’t like turning others at all for a few reasons, one, they have to come as close to death as they ever will be until they actually die, two, who wants a life on the run and of being hunted down or even having the chance of being exhiled at false traitorship or one mere mistake against the clans, and three…..this is no life to live for anyone…..I’m sure that most of us who’ve been on here can agree with me when I say this. Those humans among the people we’ve killed we feel the most regret for. This may not be true for some, but for the innocent ones that I have killed for them getting in my way or with them shoved into the middle of these barbaric wars, I feel so much guilt and regret for. They have far better lives, living in peace except for the very unfortunate FEW who have some troubles. Those who want to be “changed” or “transformed” into one of us, it is a difficult decision for us for those reasons. Please like “FreakyRJ” said, please do rethink what you are trying to do to yourselves. I’ve been on the run for over 340 years and it’s not any life to live. We have no Christmas or New Year’s, we have no Valentine’s Day that we can happily share with anyone without saying anything along the lines of “I wish we were both human”. It’s no life to live for any of us no matter what anyone says. It’s horrid and just plain death among the other ways we could live but because of the issues we cause ourselves, there is no way to avoid it.
And for the one who said, “We have to drink blood or we die,” that’s not true. We can go for months without touching blood even though it smells really great at times and we don’t even have to tap energy for that matter for a while, we just become weaker than what our true strength could be. I’m still alive and I haven’t touched a single drop of blood in over 340 years, I just recently tapped energy three days ago and I haven’t touched it since over 67 years ago. I’m clearly still here. So your theory on how we die without it is wrong. That’s all Hollywood and fairytale crap…Just so you know. But nice suggestion towards some.
It surprises me too see so many of my kind here. Although, I can not say that all are true, i can say that it humbles me too see so many reaching out into the modern age and embracing it. I am reletivly new. I havnt had much time to get grips on it yet, but it really shocks me to think of how many there are.
Morgan Sin Littelle, u have been living for 340 years?
I’ve been alive for over 3,340 years No name. I’m one of the older ones of our kin, however a few ancients who originally ruled our clans are still alive. The one who began the line in which I was born still is alive today. It amazes me at how much he’s learned by simply writing on this page. He’s posted slightly a few comments before. Caileth is his name. He’s got a few posts that have become quite old. He’s very protective of any clan member no matter what has happened to them in the past, unless they’ve killed one of their own.
Sorry for the stupid G, but how u became a vamp?
U are born a vampire or what?
sorry you guys if im bugging you with all the questions but im very curious. how did the first vampire come to be, if you guys know the answer to that?
Hey for those who have lived longer than 100 or even 1000 years. What anti wrinkle cream do you use? I’m curious…
lol If we all r askin Q’s then let I’m gonna join in^^ R there any Vamps, In Ashland Oregon, The united states?? Just wondering I’ve got a friend who lives there, and she had said there have been some strange things goin on. Yup that all I got
so…no one knows how the first vampyre came to be? oh, and one more question to add to the pile: can vampyres read minds or auras and do that sort of thing, or is that a bunch of bullshit?
peace out homies!
No name, I’m seriously confused right now…I asked that ‘cuse I was curius and it was just 1 of those things that I had 2 know. i asked my mom the same thing and she said that it would’nt be posible ‘cuse it had someting to do with the freshness of the blood….ya it was weird
Is anyone gonna answer my Q??
No one is here. Why?
I’m here, No name!
By the way, its Christmas eve!!! only 57 minutes until christmas!!! yay!!!
haha im just kidding. i hate christmas bc every christmas i had has sucked. sorry im just rambling on, its late and im getting pretty tired.
sooooooo how are you guys? my email is lonelybluebat@yahoo.com just an FYI
Yay!! Its X-mas!! I had to stay up till 1:45 helping with the presents, I wasnt really that tyred but I figured that if I didnt go to sleep soon my Bro’s would be waking up someone very cranky. And I got just about everything I wanted!! Books, a skillet, and water color pencils!! …..wow all that stuff i didnt really need to tell you all well
for christmas i had gotten several books, gift cards, and other things. oh, and guess what else? i went to visit my crazy family in tulsa. talk about stress, thank goodness im back here in chicago.
I got books (n have already gfinished most of them),
a skillet with direction on how 2 make a really big coco chip cookie in it (I love 2 cook),
water color pencils (I’ve been using them so much their already half way used),
and a camera!! yay^^ now i cant take anoying pics of my bro lol!!
I spent X-mas at my moms thank goodness!! I switch off hollidays with my parents and last time my dad had me……I dont like going 2 my dads fr X-mas, it ends up being hell. First it starts off with me reading till 2 am, my dad waking me up at 7(witch is 6 where I live) on X-mas eve to open all our presents…on x-mas EVE!!!!
while opening my presents I try 2 keep a smile on my face as i open the gifts 2 find everything i did NOT want, from necklaces 2 a make-up kit.
I go 2 bed n read till 2 am…my dad wakes me up at 7, n i open my stoking on x-mas, n do absolutly nothing fr the rest of the day, l8er I drive 12 hrs 2 get home, n I hug my mom at first sight glad I wont have 2 go back till summer time.
For christmas I got over 500 dollars, and spent like $140 dollars of it on a shity home theater thing that you can plug yer dvd and game system into and play/watch it on the wall or roof(”90”) but it sucks cuz its blurryer then it should be and the colour on it is retardedly bright. It it also unleveled so its on a slant and the recipt is at my friends house some where and im fucking starving…